Did anyone watch the Tonight programme on Monday this week? It talked about our looks-obsessed society and challenged 100 women to record the number of times they have negative thoughts about themselves.
The average British woman aged between 35 and 69 has up to 252 negative thoughts about her body every week
Over 7 days on average, the 100 women clicked a massive 252 times. That means women between the ages of 35 and 69 have around 36 negative thoughts about themselves per day. Shocking isn’t it?
It’s no suprise we have such a negative perception about ourselves and growing old when, on a daily basis, through television, magazines and even in our daily work women are being given the message that youth = beauty = popularity, therefore age = unattractive = on the shelf. This summarisation leads far too many women to feel bad about growing old and try to fight it.
Not many of us are unaware of the stink that was kicked up when we saw Strictly judge Arleen Phillips given the boot and replaced by the younger Alesha Dixon. Women everywhere took this as a proverbial kick in the nether regions and it has even been discussed in the House of Commons. Arleen was a fantastic represention for women and a perfect judge for the show. She has the full package: experience, wisdom, intelligence and beauty. My disappointment is not that Arleen was replaced by (the lovely) Alesha but that the apparent reason was to bring a ‘voice of the viewer’ to the panel and rather than getting rid of one of the guys (making it even stevens) they replaced the one experienced woman. Girls and women need to see that it’s not what you look like it’s what you know. To see positive role models like Arleen booted off the panel despite being well qualified and replaced by someone with less experience (who happens to be younger) sent the wrong message.
Age Should Be Embraced
As a young person I didn’t like the thought of reaching my late 20’s because there was so much I wanted to achieve. It wasn’t so much about ‘getting old’ that bothered me, it was the fear of not achieving what I wanted to do before I reached an age where it was considered the ‘done thing’ to settle down and be an adult with responsibilities. I don’t remember looking at older women and thinking of them as ‘old’, ‘past it’, or ‘on the shelf’. On the contrary, I relished in how much I could learn from them and loved being in the company of the older crowd. It certainly helped that I was always surrounded by confident, happy, beautiful ladies and my hope was that I would grow into one of them.
Now I’m in my mid thirties I still don’t consider myself as old. My mother is in her 50’s and I don’t consider her as old either. The idea of having cosmetic surgery or botox is an absolute no-no I would be horrified if my mother came home one day without a frown or unable to smile with her eyes. Those lines in your face, ladies, represent everything you have experienced, loved and learned in life. Next time you spot a new line or wrinkle, consider this. Each of those lines and wrinkles represent:
- Nights out with your fabulous friends
- Starting a new business venture or applying for and getting your dream job or promotion
- Falling in Love (however many times
) - Moving into your first home
- Bringing up your children and watching them graduate, go off on an adventure, get married, be successful
- And so much more!
Hide away because of age, hide your wrinkles or take steps to remove them is like trying to erase your memories and what has made you what you are today. A wonderful, beautiful and unique human being!
We need to stand up for ourselves ladies and be proud of who we are. Age is a fact of life, you either embrace it or spend your lifetime fighting and struggling against was is inevitable.